Have you ever read that Dr. Seuss book "Because a little bug with KA-CHOO!" ? The book goes through these things that happened all because this bug sneezed. It starts out with something little and before you know it this HUGE thing happens all because this tiny bug sneezed. That is kinda how my running story has been. Expect no one sneezed. It started out just wanting to get out of the house and in NO way was my goal to be a runner. I just needed a break. I slowly started setting fitness goals for myself and before I had even ran my first 10K I had signed up for my first half! What was I thinking?!? Right? WRONG! For once I was thinking!! I was thinking there is nothing stopping me from doing it but my own self doubt. You see I still see myself as the chubby girl that couldn't even walk a mile let alone run it. I still struggle with that girl every time I step out the day for a run. I spend the first 2 miles fighting with myself doubt. The voice in my head saying "You cant do this... Your not a runner!" and I have to find those voices that says "Yes you can! You have and You will.. You've done it before and you can do it again!" Many times that voice is not my own voice, its the voices of people who have supported me, encouraged me and believed in me when I was to weak to believe in myself. The feeling I get when I am done with a 6, 7, 8 mile run is so hard to explain to someone. The feeling of proving to yourself that you CAN do something you thought you never could is life changing!! My goal for 2012 was to find people in my life and share that feeling with them. Not just make this journey my own but encourage others to get out there and PROVE YOURSELF WRONG! Because it feels darn good when you do! and it feels even better when you help someone prove to themselves they can too! The best thing about struggling is being able to say to someone "I have been there" " I know how you feel" "Look how far I have come" Where I once sat in pity over my struggles, I now can rejoice in knowing my struggles can encourage others. I can look back at all the times I felt proud of myself! and all the times I cried after I finished a mileage I never thought I could do...and YES I still cry. Just last weekend as I was finishing up my 8 mile run I started to cry because like always I started my run thinking I couldn't do it but proved to myself yet again! That the voice in my head that says I CAN'T..... IS NOTHING BUT A LIAR! I CAN AND I WILL!
18 days and counting until Surf City!
